


Death Wish

by klutzy_girl



Category: Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Arguing, Death Wish, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Past Abuse
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-27
Updated: 2014-06-27
Packaged: 2018-02-06 09:43:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,003
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1853431
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/klutzy_girl/pseuds/klutzy_girl
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Grant is angry at Skye for saving him and they argue.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Death Wish

**Author's Note:**

> I don't own Agents of SHIELD and never will. No copyright infringement intended.

Ward glared at Skye but she refused to back down. “I’m not going to say sorry for saving your life, Grant Douglas. You took a stupid risk – like always – and that needs to stop.” His death wish scared the shit out of her.

“So what? I saved people.” He didn’t understand why she was so upset about this since everything had worked out in the end.

“You idiot! You nearly died and that’s why I’m this angry!” She groaned and spun around the other way so she didn’t have to face him. Ward made Skye so angry she could barely stand it sometimes. He was trying to make up for everything he had done – the whole team supported his efforts – but it shouldn’t be at the cost of his own life. 

Ward scoffed. “Why the fuck does it matter, Skye? I’m a worthless piece of shit and no one should care if I die or not. I don’t even know how you can stand to look at me! My family and Garrett knew it and so does everyone else. How can you stand to even look at me?” He didn’t understand how Skye could have so much faith in him when no one else did.

A horrified Skye stared at him until he turned around to walk away at which point she grabbed his shoulder to stop him. She cringed when Ward flinched. “Sorry. But you don’t get to walk away from me after saying those things. You know that isn’t true, right? Your life means something to a lot of people. Your parents and Maynard and Garrett are the worthless pieces of shit not you. But us? We care about you. I love you, Grant Douglas, and you need to accept that.” Damn it, she wasn’t going to cry today because she had promised herself she wouldn’t. The look on his face broke her completely.

“How?” He honestly didn’t understand. He was a monster and always would be, and it was time the team accepted it. Unfortunately, Ward had come to terms with it a lot time ago. He couldn’t ever make up for what he had done. The abuse (and he was still hesitant to call it that because it meant he was a victim, and Ward wasn’t comfortable with the label) didn’t excuse his actions. 

“I don’t know but I think you need to visit your therapist again. She can help and you know it. Please stop, Grant. I don’t want you dead. You can be a good man.” Skye sniffled and choked back a sob.

He felt guilty for making her cry and apologized. “I didn’t mean to make you cry.” Ward sighed and kissed her. “Sometimes I wish you had let Deathlok kill me,” he admitted once she pulled away from him.

Skye shook her head. “I wished that in the beginning, but now that I know the full story? I don’t believe that’s true. You’ve had a terrible life and you’re still here. Do you know how strong you are to survive everything you went through?”

Ward dropped into a chair. “You really believe that?” he questioned as she sat down next to him.

“You think I would be trying this hard to get you to see our point of view if I didn’t believe it? You don’t have to try so hard.” She leaned her head down on his shoulder and yawned.

He grinned. Still emotionally drained, Ward couldn’t help but be happy about their closeness. “I’ll try but it’s not easy and it’s never going to be.”

“That’s what Coulson said to you when he saw you in jail isn’t it?” Skye was glad he was parroting the director now – seemed like a good sign for his recovery.

Ward put his arm around her and wished he could feel the same positivity she experienced. Neither of their lives had been particularly great (understatement of the century) but Skye was so strong he could barely believe it sometimes. It was actually one of the reasons he had fallen in love with her when he hadn’t meant to (he hadn’t meant to get attached to the team either but apparently Garrett had been counting on it, a fact he learned later). “Yes,” he finally told her.

“Are you done fighting now?” Trip called from the doorway.

“Yes, it’s safe to come in now. Did everyone hear?” Skye desperately hoped not.

“FitzSimmons are still in the lab so no.” Trip cracked up at the looks on their faces. Thrilled Skye and Ward were slowly working out their problems; he honestly didn’t care about them fighting as long as it didn’t last long.

Skye held back on cringing. If Ward kept thinking of himself like this, she’d keep striking back to convince him otherwise. She wasn’t going to let him think so negatively of himself. He had survived decades of abuse and trying to make up for his past was going to take a long time. She’d be by his side the entire time (and the others had promised to stick with him too since they wanted to see him get better). “Well I hope you enjoyed the free show.”

“Not the kind of free show I was looking for.” Trip winked and felt satisfied when both of them laughed. Job well done then. Good.

“You better not be watching us.” Ward’s judgmental raised eyebrow cracked them both up and that was how Coulson found them. He ignored them and went on his way, thinking he really didn’t want to know.

This wouldn’t be the last time Grant Ward put himself in harm’s way to save someone else, but Skye and the others would keep calling him out on his self-destructive behavior. They refused to let him get away with it. They needed to get it through his head that he wasn’t worthless or a monster but it definitely wasn’t going to be an easy thing to do. But they were patient and willing to work to do so.


End file.
